"Yo man! Where's my Bobby Brown album?"

'I'd lick the bottom of that shoe."

"HOW TO OWN A PET WOLF, eHOW.COM"

"Sometimes poop is too big to go down the toilet and you have to cut it up"

"I need me a girlfriend that jukes."

"I'm just a young cub in need of a cougar."

"I COULD NIBBLE ON SOME BRAD."

"IF I COULD GET A BABY GIRL TO GIVE BIRTH TO A KUATO, I WOULD BE A HAPPY FATHER ."

"I'm just gonna watch baby chinchillas"

"I've decided I hate baby owls."

When asked what he would do if the planet was going to collide with another planet, Scrimp replies, "I would cuddle with a lion."

"WE SHOULD PARTY WITH SOME SEX OFFENDERS THIS WEEKEND."

"I CAN SAY ANYTHING NOW. YOU JUST HAVE TO PUT A FUNNY PICTURE ON IT."

"You wanna nibble on this sugar baby gurrrl?"

"Here's the nipples!"

"Someday I'm gonna find a baby in that dumpster and I'm gonna take care of it for the rest of its life."

"I need a pen. Not to use, but to stir with."

"I'm gonna decorate my apartment like Bin Laden's den."

"THEY JUST GIVE ME THEIR NUMBERS...I COULD KILL THEM!!"

"THEY SHOULD MAKE CONCENTRATION CAMPS FOR STRIPPERS. THEY'RE FILTH"

"Milwaukee mama wants a windy city slam and Lynn wants to lock me up in her coke den. "

"Want to watch Rosanne with me sometime?"

"Hi. I'm a laid back kinda guy, but I have a repulsive gouge on my index finger that may be infected as I rebel against modern medicine."

"Dude, I love it when hobo midgets lick my finger"

"i want to live inside you"

"gobble that sardine"

"YOU WANT ME TO HOOK YOU UP WITH MY MOM TONIGHT? "

"I remember last years ice-covered sidewalks too and may need to get some ice cleats so I can save lives like in Cliffhanger."

"whats the name of that movie where those three guys take care of a baby?"

"I'M A TROLL AND I WANT TO TAKE YOU ON AN ADVENTURE."

"I remember last years ice-covered sidewalks too and may need to get some ice cleats so I can save lives like in Cliffhanger."

"gimmie that midget's digits."

"She plays ho games."

"I'M A TROLL AND I WANT TO TAKE YOU ON AN ADVENTURE."

"Save sum Vicodin for me, gurl."

"I felt obligated to read the book too and own it, but you know... reading is hard."

"I HAD TO DISINFECT MY APARTMENT BECAUSE MY MOM IS STAYING THERE"

"OPEN UP YOUR TRACHEA BOY, I'M COMMING IN"

"...you seem like a stand-up baby-lady."

"i'm gonna buy you a soft pretzel girl"

"Hey, Sweets. I'd like to take you to see the movie Puss In Boots in 3D."

"FRIGGEN MORMONS."

"Hi. You in Europe or can I meet you and your dog?"

"Hi. Join me at the Boiler Room this Friday and we can poorly impersonate Robbin Williams together. Let a baby boy know." 

"whats the name of that movie where those three guys take care of a baby?"

"YOU KNOW WHAT I DO. AND I DO IT ALL FOR YOU."

"YOU CAN SHOWER AT MY HOUSE IF YOU BRING SNACKS."

"I WOULD MARRY JUST ABOUT ANYBODY I LOVE COMMITMENT SO MUCH"

"GET IN MY GHETTO, GIRL."

"i want the baby girls to know, i like to creep."

"i may be retarded but i can get you a date"

"i'm only interested if she drives drunk."

SCRIMP: "BITCH WANTS TO GET SOME CHICKEN NUGGETS."
EVELYN:"IS THAT WHAT SHE SAID?"
SCRIMP:"NO, BUT I CAN TELL."

"I GOT A PEZ DISPENSER FULL OF PLAN B PILLS, AINT NO WAY MY BABYS COMING OUT OF YOU." 

"I'm slowly integrating myself into this family."

"I wish I had autism so someone could take care of me, and I could just fold paper and color all day!"

"I TWIDDLE MY THUMBS BITCH!"

"OOO GIRL, I WANNA SHOW YOUR BABY HOW TO LIVE."

" I GOTTA KNACK FO SNACKS. HEEYY OOO."

"she wants the seed."

"What's your favorite x-files subject: mutants or government conspiracy?"

"I gots a couple quarters and I'm downing Listerine. -- Holler."

"YO GURL, SHOW ME YOUR AFRO"

"Let's go to an afro-pop concert."

"I'M GONNA DRINK CHAMPAGNE OUT OF YOUR PAGEANT  TROPHY."

"These fangs are pokin' at my herp!"

"CUT THE FAT. THAT'S WHAT I'M DOING WITH MY LIFE. NOT LITERALLY THOUGH. I NEED IT FOR WINTER."

"Hit her with my arrow."

"I want to be your Sears catalog."

"We could possibly meet In Reality Life and be pals?"

"you'll have to linger around. i only got dixxx pixxx."

"TELL HIM YOU'LL CONSUME AND DIGEST HIS TAINT AND HE'LL LEAVE YOU ALONE 4VR."

"Thanks for the rating, thought I was at most a 2.5." 

"We could possibly meet up and do some reckless night-driving? "

"SHE'S A DOUCHE."

"BABY GIRL TAKIN' A PEEEEEK."

"NEED TO FIND ME A MASCULINE BABY GURL TO HARNESS MY AMBIGUITY."

"We have a lot of enemy points, but we can harness it within our angst?"

"I shoulda got her pregs."

"I finally went on an OKCupid date!"

"ASSESS YOURSELF, BABYLOVE. YOUR REDHEAD PIC LOOKS LIKE YOU'RE RESURRECTING A DEAD CABBAGE PATCH KID."

"I'D LIKE TO GROW OLD WITH HIM"

"My great aunt's daughter in law's nephew - it's not blood related. My sister dated him."

"I gotta sift through all the incest."

"Weiner Cozies!"

"Hell na. Baby gurls gots to know."

"Take care of my DOG!"